i hope that someday i will write a book. someday when i am older and wiser. i once asked God for the gift of wisdom, which he has given at the times he deemed right, and i think that would be a sweet way for that to come out. i bet it would probably mention somewhere in there the approximate total dollars spent on "coffee" at dunn bros, caribou, starbucks, and all the indie coffee shops while i was in college and how that total may have been close to what i was paying for my actual education...ha.

it's a shame no one reads my blog. not cos i think i'm cool and that peeps should read it, in fact the opposite...i think peeps would be entertained by my triviality and/or stupidity...ha again!!

i'm a product of my independent culture. in a way, i need my independence so survive my culture. without it, my 20 plus years of mostly singleness would have been miserable. but i do go most things alone. my closest friends and family don't know all my issues although i generally tell people what's goin on when i ask. i don't like to hide stuff, which is maybe why it's so hard. i let diff people know different things and if all my friends sat and talked about me then maybe they'd know me. i'm just sick of it. i want community. i want inclusivenesses. i want to see the love of Jesus, in so many ways.

you just truly never know how much time you have. i've driven on that bridge so many times. i would've been driving on it tues night had i gone to edina and it could've easily broken then too. my dad and i drive on the 10th st bridge right across from 35w everyday and were on that one 45 minutes before 35w collapsed. but i've been avoiding that part of 35w all summer cos the construction was so annoying. it's crazy how big of a deal this is though. national news, network journalists flying in, president is involved and flying in...it's just so crazy.

i have been thinking about this almost non-stop since it happened. people may kind of wonder why as i am safe and besides having to add some extra time to my commute it didn't really affect me, on the surface. as far as i know, none of my friends were anywhere near there when it happened. you just really never know what day may be your last. just looking at the people who texted me...jess, laura...those are the relationships that matter. i'm so grateful for my life. i want to go home and be with Jesus whenever it happens I am ready for it, but at the same time I am very grateful for my life. A home with my family always waiting, my friends, the opportunity for education...i am blessed. God is good. Even when things are disastrous and don't make sense, God is very good.

you just never know. that phrase keeps repeating over and over in my mind. you just never know. "don't worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself," cos you don't even know if there will be a tomorrow. you just never know.